Regardless of the occasion, pre-lockdown we used to spend every Sunday with my siblings, Mother’s Day included. But this year will be a slow day at home involving a cooked breakfast and a long walk together – if I’m really lucky, the kids will put on one of their world-class shows for us in the comfort of our living room! An indulgent bath – alone – would be the best gift. In the early days of being a parent I suffered so badly with postnatal depression that I felt quite fraudulent celebrating Mother’s Day. But as time has passed, it’s been easier for me to see that it’s a day not to celebrate perfection but a chance to celebrate motherhood in all its lovely imperfections. Being at home with the children under such strange circumstances this past year has been really healing for me. I think that I always hid behind childcare – depression is still such a large part of my life that I’d pool my energy into the after-school hours so that the kids only ever saw the best of me. A year of not having that crutch to fall back on has been really freeing. 

Even though I am mum now, Mother’s Day still feels more like something for my mum and not for me. I’ll try to spoil her with flowers or some beauty products – I’m really into essential oils and I love Neal’s Yard products. My baby Edie is like the pandemic calendar for me as she was born shortly after the first lockdown. Being a mum second-time around has been so much better in many senses: a lot of that anxiety that I didn’t realise I had with my first child hasn’t been there and I’ve certainly been more laissez-faire – you can’t control things in a pandemic so being unable to manage every tiny detail means that I’ve learnt to let go. The past year has had its tough moments but I’ve enjoyed the closeness of being a family and how lucky we are to have each other. I won’t be expecting a present on the 14th, but a cup of tea in bed would be nice – as would a handmade card from my eldest.

Motherhood has meant more for me than ever this year. Watching our children learn and getting an insight into their education over Zoom has been really interesting – I feel like I understand so much more about them as individuals. This year Mother’s Day will probably involve a homemade roast dinner cooked by my husband – while I’d love to see my mum, grandma and mother-in-law, we’ll catch up with them over video calls. More important than gifts is the act of celebrating – I like decorating the table, planning Zoom calls and having a lovely meal together. Even though we haven’t been able to meet up so much over the past year, we have found new ways to keep in touch and if anything the bonds we have as a family have been strengthened. Showing how much we care and how much we miss seeing our mothers means that we need to think of other ways to reach out to them, be it virtually, over the phone, by post or by sending gifts.